I had just decided to treat my colon to a Valentines Day cleanse when I thought to myself “Hold on! Valentines Day is a holiday fabricated by The Man to make even more money, and I don’t hang with him!" I love my colon everyday and shouldn’t be afraid to show it. I went straight to GNC and bought every fiber infused product my dear cousin Zach pushed on me as well as an all natural calorie burner (w/out a discount I might add!)
My Lichi calorie burner causes my pits and palms to sweat while sending a cold chill through my body. Physically I’m exploding with the energy of a seasoned break dancer while my brain and eyes struggle to stay awake. I can’t focus or concentrate. My emotional state is on a constant roller coaster of euphoria and uncontrolled, anxious laughter. I have a strong desire to wear nothing but active wear and I’m peeing fluorescence. There’s obviously something special about this pill and I'm hooked after just one dose!
Next up on Somebody's Mother: Will Jessica kick her pill habit or finally join her local break dance team?
No comments:
Post a Comment