26 has led to a lot of firsts for me. The most important being that I’ve finally imagined my very own “Dream Guy”! Being too picky can lead to heart ache and loneliness but I’m confident I won’t have to hold out long before finding this one.
My dream guy…or dream MAN will have the build of a husky lumbar jack with a full but short, well kept beard. Preferably red or any shade of medium to dark brown.
He will wear red flannel and winter caps daily, with suspenders on occasion. He’ll eat mostly breakfast meat dipped in maple syrup and say things like “Do something to treat yourself will ya!” and “Why don’t you take a couple hundred from the sock drawer” while waving his linked sausage at me in an authorative manner.
He’ll rub my feet (with my socks on!) and slap my ass before leaving a room. He’ll listen to The Blues and Jazz and play something real sexy like the saxophone.
He will have a dog he would put his life on the line for (jumping into the dangerously rocky waters of a river to save “his boy” from the tree limb he climbed onto after falling in up stream a ways) and nurse birds back to health.
He will have just the right amount of chest hair and a voice so deep and soulful it makes you weep.
…Or he will be Lil Wayne.
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ReplyDeletedoes he also like silver and gold?
ReplyDeleteYukon Cornelius
haha you really scared me. For a second there I thought I may actually be inlove with Yukon Cornerlius!! Im not sure if he slaps ass but something tells me he has just a tad too much chest hair and he isnt even where plad! Did you read this post? ;)
ReplyDeletewearing plad*
ReplyDeleteoh darn... I did say Flannel in my post didnt I? Since their typically plaid* you should have assumed.....
ReplyDeleteshame on me!